“Will You Be My Bridal Bouncer?”


It’s four in the afternoon and I need to do something productive today other than carrying a 40lb box of cat litter the length of two football fields in two feet of snow and minus ten degree weather.


*Immediately signs in to YouTube and wastes half an hour*

What IS my life??


*Obtains back pillow because suddenly have become old lady*

*Decides to stop chattering on in manner of Bridget Jones….New book fantastic so far by the way!*

Happy New Year everyone!

I’m hoping to get more blogs in this year, and read more books, and go on more trips, and eat less foods that start with the letter C, but I really can’t promise anything. *Guiltily takes sip of Coke* The rioting wave of excitement that was my life at the height of it’s content quality has ebbed, and now as pleasantly normal as my routine has turned out, it leaves something to be desired in the department of interesting things worth sharing. I also have a crazy dog that steals all of my time with her adorable fluffyness!


There is however, a very exciting life happening in the world of a friend of mine, and she has asked me to be a part of her special day. No, she did not ask me to catch a baby for her…because it would be slippery and I would probably drop it, and that’s never good. No, she is strangely enough, getting married to a bloke (Who does that? Am I right?) and I am to be present, alongside the army of reinforcements called the Bridal Party, designed to keep either party involved from fleeing the scene.

Oh wait…

I have been informed that is not exactly the job of the bridal party. What do you mean they’re not actually fancy dressed wedding bouncers? Well that takes absolutely all of the fun out of it…

I guess that means I will stand (and then sit, eat and drink profusely) next to my friend in stoic support of her life decision, to be bound on paper and in the face of an invisible deity to another person who she promises to say nice things to forever and ever (mostly). That sounds about right. Oh, and according to the internet, I have to look slightly less sparkly and fantastic then her in hundreds of photo’s that she will look at for the rest of her life.

See, the internet says so!

But never fear! This I do not see as being a problem.  She’s very fantastic, and my eyes do a weird thing in pictures…every time, I have no idea why. Should probably have that looked at.

So cheers to them for being awesome and finally deciding to tie the knot!  I, in all my wonky-eyed glory, will be present and potentially bouncing the event if it at all becomes necessary. No one is escaping under my watch!


Happiest of new years to everyone!

Lots of LOVE!

-Hailey Jane

Screen shot 2012-12-19 at 6.55.41 PM


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