Tag Archives: drag queen

Q&A With the Turtleneck Lady

Greetings from the cafe!


I’m going to do things a bit differently today, it will be as if we’re having a chat, except that the conversation is going to be alarmingly one sided, because that’s how most of the internet works.

Oh, and I wanted to run a quick idea past you, if that’s alright?  I’ve gone out and sent away for a lovely and fantastic pastel pink, short, curly, synthetic lace front wig! Which I am aware is a lot of words to describe one thing. But anyway, I was wondering what everyone thinks about the two options for its use.

Option 1) Is to use it for Vlog posts, as a confidence boosting alter ego of sorts?

Option 2) I would bust it out when I embark on my next travelling adventure (this is assuming I get my funds and ethics in order) so I would be not only extremely recognizable out and about, but it would help with how nasty my hair gets when I travel. Let me explain.

I’m thinking a serious backpacking excursion across Europe, and even when I go to England for a few weeks at a time, I ALWAYS have a hard time finding somewhere reliable to wash/style my high maintenance hair while couch surfing. There isn’t enough dry shampoo in the world to sort out that mess on my head. Seriously…hear me out…This way I won’t have to deal with nasty, greasy, ratchet hair as often. Assuming this works, it will make me feel all that much better leading to a generally better experience. I clearly would still shower, but I would be less concerned with how my hair dries, or having to shower just to fix it…which, let’s be honest, is 100% why I shower every day or so when I’m at home. Not for cleanliness…but so my hair doesn’t look stupid. Cleanliness is a convenient by product. This is what my life is.

Let me know your thoughts…or any other ideas you have for the use of this marvellously colourful coiffure. Either way, I’m super excited, even if I only get to use it once, to channel Courtney Act at a friend’s Drag Queen Party. You know you love the idea. 😀

Question time!

Why Coffee and Turtlenecks?

“This is a very legitimate question, because it still doesn’t make a whole lot of sense. In truth, they are two things that I enjoy thoroughly that are also a great comfort to me. I wanted this place…this imaginary space on the wide web…to feel cozy, inviting and warm, which describes my chosen title just nicely. It’s also got a bit of a ring to it, which is a plus. I do feel like I don’t talk about turtlenecks enough, particularly because of the number of turtleneck related search terms sending people here. To be honest, there are only so many things you can say about a type of shirt before people stop listening and start worrying about your mental health, and I wouldn’t want to give too much away.”

Why haven’t you done any more Vlog posts?

“Also a legitimate question. It has a simple answer that can be narrowed down to the fact that my spontaneous two weeks of self confidence seems to have vanished, and I will get right back to making them as soon as it returns in the mail.”

Do you think Blogging is a self centered and narcissistic pastime and promotes those ideals in the current generation?

“I absolutely do, (betcha’ didn’t see that one coming!) and I am reminded of it every day when my boyfriend sees (catches) me Blogging. I push past that guilt with ferocity because I like to write, and I hope that what comes out is actually beneficial to the world or at least enjoyable. If you don’t think you’re good at what you do, then no one else is going to. And hey, even Van Gogh had a thing for selfies.”

Van Gogh

What advice do you have for someone who wants to start Blogging?

“I’m not exactly the person with the best collection of tips in this department. I would still call myself ‘starting out’ and I’ve been doing it on and off for nearly three years. Just update with thoughtful posts that you are proud of regularly, and see what happens. It’s luck mostly. My most popular posts are one’s that I’m not the most thrilled with, they just happen to have a thing people are searching for in them, like Spermaceti, Ian McEwan’s Atonement and PG Tips. Who knew the world wanted to know so much about whale oil, modern English Literature and tea.  Why do I know so much about whale oil, modern English Literature and tea? I guess I’m just awesome.”

Do you have Instagram?

“No, Apple products are dumb and I don’t believe in them, like unicorns. BBM me anytime though!  Also…on that note, social media sites kill SO much of my time and steal little tiny pieces of my soul daily. Lately the slow internet at home where I’m living has rendered tumblr useless, which is actually kinda refreshing. I imagine that’s what quitting smoking feels like. I am no longer a slave to the never ending roll of gifs and benign fandom updates. Now I just need to get off of Pinterest, Facebook and crack. Crack might be the easiest.”

What’s your favourite band?

“Right now, I’m in love with this English group from Norwich called Box of Light. I’ll link a video for you. It’s delightful and Melon is the bubbliest rockstar I’ve ever seen. I just want to snuggle her. They’ll be huge, I can feel it.”


Best book you’ve read this year?

“By far it has to be Nabokov’s Lolita. I didn’t just read this book,. I destroyed it. I wrote essays in the margins, I went back searching for passages to re-read. I watched several Ivy League lectures on the subject just to figure it out. I am now a Lolita expert! It’s so much more than what people think it is…Read it, you won’t regret it. If I get the time, and find the words to describe how magical it is justly, then I will do a post on it for you.”


One last question for you dear, do you think you will ever stop writing?

“I hope not. I’ve loved keeping a journal, writing short stories, really bad poetry (which you’ll never see because it’s THAT bad) since I was in grade school, I don’t think my life would feel right without it. I’ve got a serious story or two inside me, and until I can find a way to get them out properly, there’s not really an end in sight.”

Well that’s good news!

Thanks so much for stopping by, as always it’s been a delight!

-Hailey Jane